The Zombie Survival Guide: Part 2: Weapons and Combat Techniques

I’ve been bouncing back and forth between a few different zombie texts and stories, in order to provide a bit of variety in the entries I am posting, but I’ve managed to get back to The Zombie Survival Guide, and I’ve finally read the next section, “Weapons and Combat Techniques”.

As the title implies, this portion of the book gives a basic run-down of the various types of weapons one might employ, and some commentary about their potential effectiveness. I’m only going to comment on a few that caught my attention, but Mr. Brooks devotes quite a bit of thought to this topic, and I would encourage people to read the text for themselves.

[WEAPONS]

Beginning at the simplest end of the spectrum, in the category of bludgeons, the crowbar is highlighted as an excellent choice, and I tend to agree. I can see this tool proving very effective against a zombie skull, when either swung like a club, or driven like a spear. I also agree with Mr. Brooks opinion that being able to use this tool, for the purposes it was originally designed for, will also prove quite valuable when trying to survive an undead apocalypse.

In the category of edged weapons, the stylish katana always stands out, but this really isn’t a weapon I’d recommend for the masses. It is undoubtedly a superb instrument, especially against the undead, but I am certain that it requires a substantial amount of practice before one could use this weapon effectively, not to mention safely. I am not saying that one should pass on the opportunity to obtain a katana, but I would urge you to undergo professional training, before you accidentally maim yourself or a companion.

Directly relevant to the katana, Mr. Brooks also warns people to “Beware (of) display items”. I believe this is a very important piece of advice. Specialty shops, selling exotic knives and swords, can be found all over, but are those weapons actually “battle ready”? I would guess that few, if any, are in any way suitable for extended combat use. Now, given that authentic, “battle ready”, samurai swords are probably not that easy to come by, or cheap, Mr. Brooks suggests simply purchasing two, of any weapon you’re considering, and training with one until you find its breaking point. Then, you’ll be both comfortable with the weapon, and have a better understanding of its capabilities, and limits.

The trench spike is a weapon that I had not heard of before, but Mr. Brooks raves about its utility, and it appears to be warranted praise. As he describes it, this 7 inch steel spike was specifically designed for piercing the helmet and skull of one’s opponent. However, with trench warfare slowly disappearing across the last century, the military value of this close quarters combat weapon seems to have doomed it to the antique market. Mr. Brooks does suggest that it may be possible to obtain schematics and have one custom made.

The text goes on to discuss much more, including the rather impractical utilization of power tools, the limited value of slings and arrows, and a decent outline of the various categories of firearms one might use. I should mention that Mr. Brooks makes the explicit point of saying that “Of all the weapons discussed in this book, nothing is more important than your primary firearm.” I don’t entirely agree with that assertion, as a good machete or crowbar does not require ammunition, never jams, and is a whole heck of of a lot quieter. However, I will not deny the value of a good boom-stick.

[BODY ARMOR]

The last topic covered in this section is armor. Historical technologies, such as plate and chain mail are discussed, but generally advised against. While they may be effective at stopping a single zombie’s bite, the weight of the armor will ultimately prove fatally cumbersome and tiring. The author also mentions shark suits, helmets, bullet-proof vests, and kevlar covers, but the strongest recommendation is awarded to simply “tight clothes and short hair”.

Being unencumbered and limiting anything a zombie might be able to grab hold of seems likely to be your best defense. I think that the kevlar covers, that Mr. Brooks discusses, would be an appropriate addition, but his reservation on that point is that people have a tendency to become over confident. The kevlar would probably be an well balanced layer of protection, but nothing gets a person moving faster than the real fear of impending death.

More to come soon.

Read other “The Zombie Survival Guide” posts:

• Undergrad Intro to Zombies 101
  The Zombie Survival Guide: Part 1: The Undead: Myths and Realities
• Zombies these days just have no respect, now get off my damn lawn!
  The Zombie Survival Guide: Part 3: On the Defense
• We’re going to the Winchester!
  The Zombie Survival Guide: Part 4: On the Run